after i fainted

  • nurse:how many fingers?
  • me:3 with some lube
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  • 31 minutes ago
  • 118662

chapsnats:

if u are about to get stabbed just say “I have too much swagger for the dagger” and they will leave u alone

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  • 32 minutes ago
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  • 33 minutes ago
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  • 34 minutes ago
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absconds:

absconds:

if u have a crush on me please stand up 

image

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  • 35 minutes ago
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ethane:

rate my face on a scale of 10 to 10

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  • 35 minutes ago
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svau:

You don’t know how much someone is worth to you

until you sell them

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  • 35 minutes ago
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me when the cars honk @ eachothr on da streets:

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  • 8 hours ago
  • 48

It happened. Get on with it.

(via yoursixwordstory)
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  • #wisest words to ever exist tbh
  • 11 hours ago
  • 2482

Life’s too short to drink crappy coffee and cry over boys who don’t care.

Matty Healy (the 1975)
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  • 11 hours ago
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  • 11 hours ago
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  • 11 hours ago
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  • 11 hours ago
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greatwhiteprivilege:

liking all ur posts cuz im attracted to u…. also i like most posts

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  • 11 hours ago
  • 19
  • House phone:*rings*
  • Me:nah
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  • 11 hours ago
  • 282555
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